Monday, April 16, 2007

Top 10 Things I Leared About Taking a 4 Year Old to France

Most people just looked at me like I had a frog growing out of my head when I told them I was taking my son to France. After all, he's a rambunctious four year old and neither my wife nor I speak French. I have to admit, it was trying at times. Now that we are back I realize we have memories we'll keep forever. Some memories are fond ones. Others are memories we laugh at now. Of course some of the laughs are still a little manic but I'm sure this will pass in time.

But there were lessons learned from taking Zack. I've listed ten of them here in hopes others might be better prepared than I when taking a preschooler overseas.



  1. A jet lagged 4 year old is no fun. You may logically realize you need to get on a sleep schedule fitting the current time zone but a four year old is ill-equipped to grasp this and will keep you up all hours wanting to play.
  2. Paris, in one word, sucks. The people are in a hurry and therefor a bit rude. The drivers are insane. There are nice people there and thanks to all those that helped the lost Texans.
  3. With a 4 year old, Paris sucks more.
  4. Be prepared to eat lots of French food; mostly French Fries since McDonalds are everywhere and look just like their American counterparts.
  5. The high speed train (TGV) is wonderful and much better than flying. With a child in tow, it gets even better since they have a lot of cars they can explore.
  6. French food (once you get past McDonalds) is very good.
  7. French wine is very good and available at a low price.
  8. French is not an easy language to learn, and much like the dialect of the southern United States, drops the last few pronounced letters.
  9. If you try to teach a child to say C'est Bon (translated "This is good") in French, he just says "Bon"
  10. Once a 4 year old gets over his jet lag he has one good day then wants to come home.


Top things my wife learned about dealing with a four year old in France
  1. 4 year olds love trains, trams, buses and water and you will spend much time on and in these
  2. 4 year olds do not like to shop for food, clothes or anything other than trains, buses, planes…….
  3. When a mom with child has a breakdown in the airport because they have missed their flight back to the states and has no way to contact her husband, the French airport staff are very accommodating and pleasant and they buy you food.
  4. 4 year olds do not like to hurry, even when there is only 15 seconds to get on and off the trams
  5. 4 year olds love to embarrass you (I have one memory of him sticking his bare feet in the face of passenger sitting next to him on the plane)
  6. French bread is not fattening, of course it may be the 4 miles you have to walk to purchase the bread that causes that illusion
  7. I do not think that feeding bread to the ducks is an acceptable thing to do in France
  8. There is no grass around the sidewalks
  9. There is dog poo around every tree along the sidewalks
  10. Motorcycles drive fast on the sidewalks
  11. The French love blond children, therefore reinforcing the “I am the center of attention” mentality



Of special note is the fact that Zack watched King Kong in French from the hotel room after being a complete snot when Debbie was trying to shop for shoes. Eventually Debbie gave up and returned to the hotel angry that her shopping plans fell through.

There is one scene where King Kong is sliding on the ice playfully with the heroine. Zack said, "Ah, he loves her. He wants to buy her shoes." Those of you without kids won't realize how truly funny that is.

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